‘Sports’ Stories
In The Doghouse
View all posts by TheProfessorOn one occasion our class was creating and reviewing our emergency escape plans. In these plans, students create a detailed map of their house, and label possible escape routes.
In the labeling process they also labeled things like “my room” and “parents’ room.” When the kids presented their escape plans, a couple of kids seemed to have a few unique markers. In one case a boy pointed to the couch on the map and explained “that’s where Daddy sleeps sometimes,” and another labeled a small room in the basement “Daddy’s bedroom,” distinct from the master suite.
Go figure!
Rhymes with What?!?!?
View all posts by GymClassWhile on recess duty, a 1st grade girl came up to me and said that a boy swore at her and said the S word. I asked her if she could tell me what it was and she got nervous about saying it outloud. When I inquired more, I asked her what it rhymes with. Without missing a beat she said it rhymes with “F%#K”. After pulling my jaw off of the ground, I quickly told her that I would go talk to him and reminded her not to use that word again either.
I forgot a towel…
View all posts by MrTeacherI took my grade 5 class on a field trip to the local swimming pool and after we had finished and were getting change I see one student outside of a bathroom stall putting squares of toilet paper over him. When I asked him what he was doing, he said he had forgotten his towel.
What’s your favourite colour?
View all posts by TheTeacherI was teaching a sports class to a bunch of 3 to 5 year olds and on the first day I asked them what their favourite colour was as an ice breaker. The first child responded with blue. The next kid said yellow. When I askd the third child, he yelled out, “POOOOOO!!!!” I couldn’t help but think this is going to be a long sports class with this kid.
The Ladies Don’t Complain
View all posts by grade7teacherLast week we participated in the Terry Fox Run at my school to raise money for cancer research. Having the oldest students in the school, most of my grade 7 class was finished the run before everyone else. It was a very hot day and the students were drinking water after they had finished when I see one boy in my class take his shirt off and pour water over his head. I tell him to put his shirt back on and he resonds by saying, “Why? The ladies don’t complain!”
What Time is it Mr. Wolf?
View all posts by TheTeacherI was teaching a general sports class to a group of 3 year olds and for a warm up game we played What Time is it Mr. Wolf? For those of you unfamiliar with the game, the wolf calls out a time and everyone takes one step for each hour (ie. for 4 o’clock everyone takes 4 steps) getting closer and closer to the wolf. One little girl was very excited to be the wolf. She had a smile from ear to ear when it was her turn and little did I know she had a surprise for all of us. We all ask her, “What time is it Mr. Wolf?” and she responds with, “10 million o’clock.” After having a good laugh and getting her to settle on 10 o’clock I thought she was getting the hang of the game as her next answers were 3 o’clock and 4 o’clock. We were no more than a step away from her when we asked her again, “What time is it Mr. Wolf?” We were expecting her to say lunch time, but instead to our surprise she yelled out, “INFINITY AND BEYOND O’CLOCK!”
Red means stop, greens means go, yellow means…
View all posts by Mr.BravoI was teaching a 4-5 year old soccer class and playing a game of red light green light to introduce the concept of trapping the ball and dribbling the ball close to their feet. During explanation of the game, I began by relating the game to how their mommies and daddies drove when they see traffic lights.
I asked the group: ” when your mommies and daddies drive and see a red light, what do they do?” The group yelled out loud: “THEY STOP!”
I asked the group: ” when your mommies and daddies drive and see a green light, what do they do? The group yelled out: “THEY GO!”
Lastly, I asked: “what happens if they see a yellow light?” Most of the children were hesitating to answer, but one eager boy yelled out: “THEY STEP ON IT!”
I looked over at the mother who put her head down and began laughing continuously at the side bench while other parents began laughing and giggling as well. In the end, I decided to just play with red and green light to avoid any possible injuries.
What kind of stretch is that?
View all posts by TheTeacherWe had just finished a warm up in my grade 8 P.E. class and I was having students perform some mirror stretching with a partner. I look over to see a student (the biggest kid in class) performing what appeared to be tai chi. His partner was not mirroring him and was laughing. I ask him what he is doing and he responds by telling me that he watched Star Wars last night and is pretending to be Obi-Wan Kenobi. As he said this he pulled out an imaginary light saber from his pocket.
Play Catch….?
View all posts by DizzleDuring a parent and toddler sports class we were practicing our hand eye coordination. i instructed the parents to throw the soccer ball lightly for their child to try to catch. The first stage was to throw the ball underhand and let it bounce once before it reached the child. When i demonstrated it to the class, i managed to bounce the ball perfectly into the 2 yr olds arms. The children were shown how to be ready for the catch and most the parents were successful with bouncing the ball into their childrens reach. As i circulated the room i notice one dad had taken it up notch. He was throwing the ball directly to his child, underhand, as his little 2 yr old would try to catch it out of mid-air. They caught my attention after i saw the little boy take one off his face. He seemed rattled but did not cry. Both his father and i tried to laugh it off with him. The dad then tried again…..and again DOMED the boy square in the face. I understood the dads persistence bacause earlier i did see the boy catch one out of the air. After the second face shot, compliments of a size 4 soccer ball, i kept a straight face and I encouraged the father to allow the ball to bounce before reaching his sons hands.
Heads Up!
View all posts by TheProfessorDuring the first lesson of teaching children’s tennis I always make sure my students understand the importance of being aware of their space. Between all the volleys, spikes, and lightening fast strikes, it’s a dangerous world for those venturing into neighbouring courts. And with beginners, rogue balls even penetrate the sanctity of your own court, so I always make sure that I tell students to “keep their head up and eyes peeled.” Now, children’s tennis can be a very challenging course to teach in and of itself. Expecting a six year old to be properly coordinated is a laughable feat, so I often find myself tirelessly reinforcing stance and swing mechanics to the youngest students in hopes that something will sink in.
Last week I had a particularly challenging new student who monopolized the majority of my time and concentration during our rallying sessions. Try as I might, getting through to her seemed fruitless. But little to my knowledge, was becoming so involved in this student that I was forgetting some of foundational principles. So sure enough, at some point in my toils I suddenly felt a jolt to my forehead. I looked up, dazed, to see a couple of my neighbouring students pointing and laughing hysterically me. Turns out I had become the latest victim of a rogue ball. It’s a week later now, but I still have a boisterous welt from the impact. Looks like I should have been paying more attention to my own instructions!
