‘Other’ Stories
You have to throw from your sweet spot
View all posts by DizzleI was teaching a 3-5yr old basketball class and during a down time in the lesson some of the boys were trying to score in the big hoops – 9ft high. One of the older boys was granny shooting- with great success. I demonstrated to the rest of the class showing them that in order to get the ball up high enough they had to shoot granny style – beginning from between your legs. I asked David to demonstrate for us because he was able to through the ball high and accurate. As he was demonstrating he instructed the rest of his classmates that they must shoot from their penis…..lol. I of course began to laugh. His mom noticed that he was getting his shots in so she decided to come to the other end of the gym and take a couple pictures of him. After hearing him tell the rest of the kids his technique a couple times i told him to share his strategy with his mom. I could not hold in my laughter as i watched him describe his technique to his mother…..she found it quite amusing as well, especially when he pointed to his sweet spot to help better describe his shooting technique. I then had to debrief the class before the word penis spread throughout the gym : )
Teachers Don’t Make That Much!
View all posts by grade7teacherI was speaking to some of my grade 7 students after school the other day when one of them asks me if I have a second job to which I reply I do. She told me she wasn’t surprised about this and when I asked her why this didn’t surprise her she responded with, “I was sure you had a second job because I saw you have an iphone 4 and we all know teachers don’t much that much!”
Nudity in class!?
View all posts by DancingQueenDuring a particularly special dance class the dance students were invited to wear their pajamas to celebrate a dance ’fun day’. Many of the small children indulged in this invitation and came to dance class in their cutest jammies. After allowing the children to get a drink in between dances I turned around to return to my group of 3 and 4 year olds. Upon glancing up I noticed that the only boy of the class had taken it upon himself to strip down into his underwear because his fleece pajamas were just too hot! After trying to contain my laughter I had to explain to this boy that it was important for everybody to wear their clothes during dance classes. He begrudgingly re-dressed himself but I’m still not sure he was convinced…
Canadians vs. Americans
View all posts by grade7teacherIt was snowing the other day and the principal came in to talk to my grade 7 class about how there are no snowballs allowed at school. She told the students that there are many other fun things you can do in the snow like build snow forts, make snow angels and even make igloos. She then mentioned how many Americans think that everyone in Canada lives in an igloo. As soon as she made this comment a student in the back of the class pipes up and says, “Well, many Canadians think Americans live in McDonald’s!”
I’m sorry I asked…
View all posts by DancingQueenI’m a dance teacher and was just getting ready to start teaching a class of small kids. I was lining them up in a row when I noticed one little one standing awkwardly in the corner. I asked her if there was something wrong when she loudly yelled that she “had a fart stuck in her tummy!”. A couple moments passed, and a horendous odour, and our little dancer was just fine again! Maybe next time I just won’t ask…
Truth or Dare!
View all posts by grade7teacherI was on supervision at recess the other day and overheard three girls that were in grade 2 talking as I walked by them.
Girl 1: “Truth or dare.”
Girl 2: “Ummmm…. ummmm…. hmmm…. ummm….”
Girl 3: “Hurry up and pick already!”
Girl 2: “Truth!”
Girl 1: “Ok. Have you ever seen your mom naked?”
Girl 3: “Oh my gosh!”
Girl 2: “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!”
At this point girl 2 and 3 ran off and girl 1 chased them.
Too Stressed?
View all posts by DancingQueenWhile teaching a small group of dancers a new dance, I slowly demonstrated a small portion of the step to be learned. After a couple of tries one of the dancers became visibly frustrated with the difficulty of the step. She suddenly looked at me and said “Don’t frustrate me. I have too much stuff going on in my life to be learning this; I have tons of homework, choir practice and I’m just really stressed out right now.” This would have all been very understandable, but my student was only 7 years old! I guess they start young these days!
Did you fight in the UFC?
View all posts by WestCoastTeacherA grade 6 student came up to me the other day and asked, “Do you have a black eye?” After telling him that I don’t and that it may just look like that from a lack of sleep, he said that he was sure that I had one and thought that I was a UFC fighter because of my black eye. He then told me that he wanted to know if I was going to fight Brock Lesnar.
Corny Halloween Joke
View all posts by MrTeacherI was in a grade 2 class just the other day and we were going over the calendar in the morning and the kids became very excited when I mentioned Halloween coming up. One little boy raised his hand on the carpet and and said, “I have a Halloween joke.” After telling him to share he stands up and asks, “When does a skeleton laugh?” After a few kids guessed I asked him why and he responded with, “When someone tickles his funny bone!”
The Cat Came Back…
View all posts by TheProfessorWhen teaching summer camp (6-10 years old) this year I had one child who was VERY independently minded. Once he had made an observation, nothing could stop him from following through with some sort of action plan. This led to some rather curious scenarios emerging over the course of the week. But none of them compare to that which happened on our Friday field trip to the local spray park. It was a long walk, and one FULL of distractions. At one point a cat hopped out of some bushes and began following beside us on the sidewalk. Instantly this child became fixated on the cat, fell in love with it, an tried communicating with it for the better part of that block. ”Meow!” he would say in hopes of a response, and sure enough, the cat would answer him back each and every time. I finally realized that the cat wasn’t going anywhere, so I had to shoe him away and explain to the now upset boy that the cat couldn’t be his, even if it was now his “friend.”
So we finally arrived at the pray park (cat-free) and had an otherwise unremarkable, albeit enjoyable, time. By the time we had to go the cat was but a distant memory, and we marched off single file back to camp. But what I had forgotten was still fresh in this camper’s mind. So when we passed the original bush he inquired “is the cat still there?” all the while stopping and meowing directly into the bush repeatedly. Sure enough, even before I could respond, out jumped that darn cat… Maybe they did share a special bond after all?
