‘Fine Arts’ Stories
Careful What You ‘Hand’ In
View all posts by TheProfessorThis one is rather crude. I was in an art class for the day recently, and the day was going really well. All the students were quiet, polite and working constructively. Towards the end of the class a couple of the less productive ones at the back of the class started to lose focus. You could tell that they were generally goofy and laughing about something, although it wasn’t clear at the time. But they weren’t bothering anyone, so I didn’t make a big deal out of it.
At the end of the day one of the students comes up to me with a piece of paper. He smirked and said “the guy I sit beside wanted to hand this in.” He laughs, head back to his desk, and him and his buddy head towards the door. Turning over the paper I’m met by a single painted handprint in the middle of the page with a capitalized phrase above; it reads “I masturbate a lot with this hand,” signed the student’s name (which has been erased and replaced with another students name. A little shocked at the nature of the work, I folded it up, and left a note for the teacher. In the note one of my suggestions is for the students to obviously not sit beside each other any more, and another being that they might benefit from a trip to the councilor’s office to have a chat about boundaries…
Easter Bunny?
View all posts by DancingQueenI was teaching a dance class to a group of young girls. While helping them tie their dance shoes I asked the group if they were excited for the upcoming Easter holidays, to which they all responded “YES!”. I asked the girls if they thought the Easter bunny would visit me and one tiny little girl who looks to be about 6 years old said “No, you’ll be hiding the eggs because the adults hide the eggs and the kids pretend to believe in the Easter bunny because that’s the only way we get chocolate!”. Suffice it to say that I was more than a bit surprised at this little one’s comment and so were many of the little girls who had just learned the truth about the Easter bunny for the first time.
Little Miss Princess?
View all posts by DancingQueenI was teaching a dance class to a group of very small children and was paying particular attention to a 4 year old who had only recently joined the class. While practicing with her privately I asked her if she wanted to stop for a drink of water, to which she responded with an affirmative head nod. The girl was quick to tell me, however, that she did not have a water bottle with her. This is not unusual and luckily we have access to a small kitchen with a sink. I led the little one to the kitchen and showed her how to drink from the tap…I even went so far as to demonstrate for her. When I finished getting my drink I looked at the girl who was positively horrified that I would drink from the tap. The little girl, looking at me with disdain, said “I would like some water but it better be in a glass.” Well EXCUSE me!! Needless to say the stubborn little girl was very thirsty by the time her hour long class was over!
I’m sorry I asked…
View all posts by DancingQueenI’m a dance teacher and was just getting ready to start teaching a class of small kids. I was lining them up in a row when I noticed one little one standing awkwardly in the corner. I asked her if there was something wrong when she loudly yelled that she “had a fart stuck in her tummy!”. A couple moments passed, and a horendous odour, and our little dancer was just fine again! Maybe next time I just won’t ask…
You can dance?
View all posts by DancingQueenWhile teaching a class of young dancers, I was in charge of the youngest group (aged 5-7). All of the students were lined up nicely while I demonstrated a dance sequence for them to learn. Suddenly, the smallest little 5 year old put her hands up on her hips and excitedly exclaimed “You’re actually a pretty good dancer!”. Well gee…thanks, I think?
Hungry for Attention?
View all posts by DancingQueenWhile teaching a dance class I was rehearsing with my 5 year old students for our annual year end recital. One little girl was fidgeting with her fingers and mumbling incessantly about something. After taking a closer look I saw that my student had a very small blood blister on the tip of her finger. I told her to stop thinking about it and to make fists with her hands as per Irish Dancing protocol. A few minutes later all of my students were dancing when this same little girl breaks out into blood curtling screams. I noticed some blood dripping from her finger and quickly realized that her blood blister had popped. I quickly took the little girl to a back room where I helped her to rinse off her finger and tried to soothe her screams a bit. A few minutes had passed and I escorted my little student to our first aid kit where I got her a bandaid for her finger. After putting the bandaid on I asked the girl if she was okay now. Still slightly teary eyed, the little one turned around and said “Oh yeah, I was always fine but if I cry it gets me attention! This never hurt me at all!” Maybe I’ll keep this trick in mind to use on my husband next time!
Can I Help You?
View all posts by DancingQueenWhile teaching a tiny tots’ dance class, I sent the kids to take a break and have a drink. I noticed one of my students, a 3 year old boy, struggling with all his might to open his water bottle. I walked over to him and asked him if he’d like me to open his bottle for him, to which he responded, “I don’t need your help, I’m a BOY you know!”. Alrighty then! I don’t think the poor boy ever got his drink open!
Umm…what?!
View all posts by DancingQueenWhile teaching a toddler’s dance class one of my 3 year old students came running up to me and gave me a bear hug. This student is notoriously our most difficult student to manage, so it was especially humorous when she said “I really like you. I like you even when you get on my back!”
Pregnant Dance Teacher?
View all posts by DancingQueenI was teaching a class full of toddlers aged 2-4 when I was explaining to one of my little students that the second dance teacher was away for a little while since she had a baby. This concept is very confusing and perplexing to these little guys, but I was shocked nevertheless when one of the 3 year olds said to me “I suppose you’re having a baby too!”. Needless to say, this little 3 year old caused quite the stir that night!
Paper mache feels like…
View all posts by grade7teacherWe were making Grecian vases in class and students were starting on the first step of this project which was to paper mache their balloons. I overhear one student say, “Wow, this stuff feels like the soup I have for dinner. It looks better much though.”
